


A History of Understanding

by mylostlovers



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Bakery and Coffee Shop, Bisexual Spencer Reid, Bottom Spencer Reid, Derek Morgan & Spencer Reid Friendship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Spencer Reid, I hate tags, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau & Spencer Reid Friendship, Light Angst, M/M, Oblivious Spencer Reid, Penelope Garcia & Spencer Reid Friendship, Ralvez - Freeform, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Spencer Reid Fluff, Spencer Reid Whump, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:42:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28369314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mylostlovers/pseuds/mylostlovers
Summary: Luke Alvez has been an agent at the BAU for a few weeks now, and already Reid is beginning to think him and the new agent understand each other more than anyone else.
Relationships: Luke Alvez/Spencer Reid
Comments: 7
Kudos: 63





	1. A Deafening SIlence

**Author's Note:**

> just a quick note: this will take place starting in season 11, and the prison storyline will not be in this fic because I think it would be too hard to work into the storyline I'm thinking of doing. Hope you enjoy!

The problem was the silence. It was beginning to eat Reid up from the inside out. Normally he thrived in silence, being able to sit in a quiet library, as the only sounds made were sips of coffee, the turning of pages and the scratching of a pen on paper. This silence was something more. This silence overwhelmed every inch of Spencer Reid.

It was 11:30 pm, and he was somehow still at the BAU finishing up some files. It wasn’t his first time staying late, hell on a few occasions he’d spent the whole night there, living off of coffee and his own desire to not go home to his empty apartment.

Though this time, the atmosphere was different. This time, Agent Luke Alvez was sitting a few feet away, and it took all of Reid’s willpower to not say something stupid. It wasn’t even like Reid _cared_ if he said something stupid, but Luke was a new agent, and he wasn’t trying to completely scare him off.

The rustling of papers and footsteps growing closer, made Reid tense up, and his bouncing leg abruptly stopped. He slowly turned over his shoulder to watch as Luke approached him. “Hey Reid do you happen to know the statistics for female arsonists?”

“Actually it’s a more complex issue than a percentage. There’s been a lot of debate among psychologists if the rates are 1 in 5 or 1 in 10. Arsonists typically aren’t caught so the data gets skewed. In fact, Only about 10% of arsonists are caught, and out of them only 1% are usually convicted.” Reid stated. Facts. They always seemed to calm him down. His fingers, which had been fidgeting with a pen, seemed to slow down their rapid clicking, as the statistics spewed out of him. He had always found comfort in factual knowledge. Facts couldn’t be skewed. They couldn’t lie, or deceive him in any way. Facts were a blanket of comfort.

“Huh, interesting. Alright, well thanks Reid.” Luke turned on his heel, his dark eyes examining the file as he walked away significantly slower.

“Is uh- Is something bothering you about that case?” Reid asked. He wasn’t sure what had prompted the question, but whatever it was Reid wanted to find that part of him and tell it to shut up.

To Reid’s surprise, Luke nodded and turned back around, sitting on Reid’s desk as a long sigh escaped his lips. “I don’t know, I think I’m just hesitant to close this case. It ended so badly.”

Reid remembered this case alright. Brian Andrews. Arsonist. White male. Age twenty-five. Set fire to buildings that reminded him of his failures. In the end, Luke had ended up shooting the unsub, and he hadn’t made it. It was always difficult to end cases like that.

“I guess I’m just looking for a reason to feel guilty over killing him. Imagining him being innocent makes it easier for me to be upset over it.”

Reid had a file open in his lap, and as Luke had been speaking he had been reading as well as listening, until Luke said that. He slowly placed his file down, and adjusted himself in his seat so he could look at Luke. “These types of cases are difficult. But in the end you just have to know you did the right thing. If you think of him as guilty it will be easier to admit to yourself why you had to do that. Maybe start by closing that file.” He gave a signature awkward smile to Luke before clearing his throat, glancing down at his watch.

“I should get going…” He mumbled. “I have a call to take in the morning that I have to be up for. See you tomorrow Luke.” He arranged all of his files into a stack before putting them into his, bag and smiling at Luke for what must’ve been the millionth time that day.

Luke stayed situated on Reid’s desk, his eyes following as he watched the other clean up the desk area. Everything about Reid was so intelligent. The way he held himself, the way he spoke, it was all so articulate and quite frankly, _beautiful._ That really was the only word for how Luke felt about Dr. Spencer Reid. “Goodnight Reid. See ya tomorrow.”

Before Reid left, Luke saw a sparkle in Reid’s brown eyes. It was a look he remembered well. It was the look Reid had given him when they’d first met in that debriefing room, only a few weeks ago.

-

“Listen Newbie it has nothing to do with me hating you, maybe if you _let me be_ for once, I would actually find something enjoyable about your presence.”

“Ouch Garcia, and here I was thinking you might actually start liking me.”

The conversation had grabbed hold of Reid’s attention. It wasn’t like he had a habit of eavesdropping on his coworkers, but he did have a habit for checking up on people.

After his conversation with Luke, Reid wanted to make sure that he was alright. He had felt the guilt of his job many times before, and while he was certainly no expert on recovering from that guilt, he liked to think of himself as a good listener.

He was just about to get up when he heard something. Or rather, it was what he didn’t hear. No longer did he hear the bickering of Garcia and Luke. Now the room was filled that that _buzz._ The answering of phones, heels clacking, and the rustling of papers.

He lifted his head and looked around, lifting a hand to push back his hair from his face.

“Hey.”

He quickly turned, noticing Luke was sitting on his desk again, the same spot as he had been last night.

He leaned his elbow onto his desk and turned his body to face the other agent. “Hey Luke, feeling any better today?”

“Yeah, yeah I guess I am, I just wanted to say thank you about last night you know.” Reid noticed that he was fidgeting with a file, and his eyes couldn’t help but watch as the other turned the folder over and over in his hands, thumbing the pages and photographs on the inside.

Reid couldn’t help but laugh. “Help? I-uh I didn’t even do anything.” He pointed out.

“Well I guess it must have been something you said because I finished the file. Gonna hand it in to Prentiss right now.”

Silence fell upon them like a warm blanket. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable, it was like a silent agreement was passing between them.

_You help me, and I help you._

“What are all these books for?”

Reid raised an eyebrow, his lips forming to ask what he was talking about, before he saw Luke’s eyes on the stack on books on his desk. “Oh _these_ books.”

“Were there other books I could be talking about?”

His laugh came out quiet, easygoing, as he shook his head, lifting the top book off the stack. “I’ve been wanting to do some research on different mental illnesses. I’ve been wanting to do a class on it and how identifying these things can be useful in the field, how to handle these unsubs, and trying to break stigmas around them.”

“That sounds like a great idea Reid, I think you should do it.” There was that smile. The smile that Luke always had. It was full of pure happiness, and made his brown eyes twinkle. It made Reid feel welcome. After all of his years at the BAU he still struggled to feel welcome there, struggled with the fact anyone would want him there. But never had he felt that way with the new agent.

There seemed to be an understanding amongst the two of them, they were both intellects, both felt like outsiders, and while they certainly had their differences, at the end of the day Reid felt like Agent Alvez really _got_ him in a way no one else did.

“Well I should get this to Prentiss before she comes asking for it, if you have some time later though I’d like to hear about what you read.”

Luke cast a glance at the pile of books, tapped Reid’s desk and then was on his way, walking up the stairs to the Unit Chief’s office.

Reid caught himself watching after him, slumped in his seat and observing how the other agent seemed to have just slid his way into the BAU family without trying very hard. Slowly, he adjusted himself to be seated in the fort of his books and he began to flip through the pages.

As he read, the back of his mind thought about how he hadn’t met someone so different from him, who understood him so well.


	2. What a Wonder You Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the dead of night Luke meets up with Reid to hear about all he's learned. Reid reflects on how different Luke is from the others in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the long delay :(  
> a bit of a longer chapter, but also a lot of internal dialogue  
> I hope it isn't too bad :(

This setting was beginning to be oddly familiar, and comforting to him. The silence of the usually bustling office, the darkness that closed in on the place from all edges, and of course, the people. Well, the person.

Normally when anyone else accompanied him at the office this late, it was more awkward than anything. Stifled coughs, sipping coffee and rustling of files. Even if it was someone like JJ, who he was rather close to. The late night atmosphere seemed to suck the life out of everyone. As if the dreary crime scene photos and back and forth of the daytime had finally sunk into them. Realization having settled in their heart.

Though, as Reid had discovered the previous night, not Luke Alvez. No, Luke Alvez was very conversational for the late night. He seemed immune to the plague of pensive contemplation. Even before the previous night, the agent had been a perfect mix of quiet enough to let Reid get his work done, but also had found moments to speak about cases, and how files were going.

Today was no different, except for the strange feeling of anticipation in Reid’s stomach. No one had actually wanted to hear him ramble before, and he was a little surprised that Luke had asked him to tell him about what he had learned on mental illnesses. Not only had he listened to Reid ramble earlier, but he was offering to subject himself to it.

As it was, Reid was very well versed in the field of mental health. Between his mother and the many times he thought he was losing his own sanity, he had done enough reading on the subject to have a solid idea of what his lesson plan would be. Luke was nothing more than another person to bounce ideas off of. Another person who might be let down by the dreary topic, even if it _was_ closely related to their job.

The doors to the BAU office opened, and normally Reid wouldn’t have noticed, but with no one around it was hard not to. He returned to his file and picked up his mug, tilting his head back to drink. Empty. Lowering the cup he squinted down at it in disdain.

“What did your cup ever do to you?”

Reid lifted his head, and his lips curled into a smile, feeling caught, he let out an awkward laugh. “It’s empty.” Is what he settled for.

Luke stood next to Reid’s desk, leaning against it with a smile on his face. That _fucking_ smile. Something about it filled Reid’s heart with hope. With the flutter of something that made him feel like anything was possible, like anything could happen, like things could get better. It was interesting to Reid how someone could show so many emotions on their face. Sometimes, like now, Luke looked like the happiest person alive. Other times, his eyebrows knitted together, concern filling his eyes, he looked like he wanted nothing more than to give whoever was in front of him a hug.

Unfortunately, Reid often felt like he was receiving one of those pitying looks.

_Poor Doctor Reid, been at the BAU for years and has been unable to leave his mark._

It was times like this, when he received so little as a simple smile, that Reid began to realize what others must think of him. When someone smiled at him and really _meant_ it, he always became aware of how he didn’t see that often.

Sure, JJ was always smiling at Emily, or Penelope, or Matt, and there were times when she smiled at Reid, but those smiles weren’t the same. With everyone else her smile lit up the room, laughter escaping through her perfect teeth, her happiness unwavering. But then, then when her eyes settled on Reid they became washed over with guilt, despair, _pity. Pity_ for Reid who had been unable to find love and happiness, something that seemed to come easy to others at the BAU.

Reid who had yet to do anything significant or worthwhile, Reid, who for the first part of his career couldn’t “shoot his way out of a wet paper bag.” Reid, who had to take up teaching because maybe he would finally be useful. Maybe the Boy Wonder would finally be a wonder.

But now, in the faint glow of the office, Luke Alvez stared at Reid like he _was_ a wonder. Like he was worth love and happiness. “Would you like me to fill it up for you Doctor Reid?”

Reid picked up on the teasing in his voice, the subtle lilt as it raised and lowered itself again. There, Luke stood, arm outstretched for his empty mug of coffee and finally, Reid surrendered and handed it over. A tingling feeling jolted through his body as he watched Luke leave him in silence, going to the coffee pot. As if there was no greater importance in the world than filling up Doctor Reid’s mug with hot coffee.

“Sugar? Cream?” Called Luke, turning his body back towards the bullpen, back towards _Reid_.

He floundered for a moment. How much sugar did he want? How much did he normally take? Or was it creamer he preferred? Or did he take it black? “Two teaspoons sugar.” He was surprised to hear his own voice, and suddenly overcome with embarrassment from his mental block, he tucked his head down to his books and notes. Tucked his head down to where it was safe. Where he wouldn’t be judged or mocked or pitied. Where he could hide until Luke Alvez returned with his coffee and two teaspoons of sugar.

The silent thump drew his attention back up to Luke, who was still smiling at him as though he were the most interesting book alive. “So, I believe you were going to tell me all you learned from these books of yours.” Luke lifted a book up off the stack, looking it over cover to cover.

Reid watched his strong, tanned hands, spin the book over and over, then he looked up to his face. There was no sign of ridicule or boredom, but pure fascination. This was the thing about Luke Alvez, at his core he was an intellect. He was like Reid. He was a wonder.

Before he was aware he was doing it, he was speaking. Facts flowed out of him, speaking rapidly and flipping through books to present to Luke, in case he wished to read them later.

It was so rare that he got to ramble. Got to show off his interests. Most of the time when he went on rants like this, in the field or not, he got shot down. His mood entirely deflated by someone sighing, someone shaking their head, a grumble to “Get on with it” or sometimes when he was done a remark of “Thanks, but I don’t care.” Over and over again, he allowed himself to build up hope that _finally_ someone wanted to hear what he had to say. But time and time again he was kicked down. Blindly, Reid would reach out his hand yet again, and hope he wouldn’t be toppled down with harsh words.

Today was a rare occasion. Luke was a good listener, he discovered. He nodded and looked into Reid’s eyes, only pulling away to stare down at a book he’d been handed, thumbing through the pages. With each time Luke performed a simple gesture, a simple movement to let him know he was there, and he was listening, Reid felt his hope grow.

He wasn’t sure how long he spoke before it became less of a rant, and more of a conversation. Luke asked questions and Reid was eager to answer. The conversation fell into a natural ebb and flow, with pauses to catch their breath or to sip on coffee. On one such break, Luke leaned across the desk and picked up a book. “This one. Is it any good?”

“Are you asking me for book recommendations?”

“What can I say Reid? You’ve pitched the topic well. I am thoroughly interested in the human psyche as it is after all my _job_ , but you’ve presented a bunch of new information to me. You think differently.”

You think differently. The phrase ricocheted in Reid’s head. What did that mean? Was this the time where he insulted Reid? Where he acted bored and uninterested? But as he stared back at him, a smile on his lips, he knew that this wasn’t met as a jab. It was an accolade. It was Agent Alvez speaking to him: one intellect to another. Admiring his work, admiring his thoughts, admiring his _mind._ Reid discovered that he rather liked someone admiring his mind.

He lifted his coffee mug and took a sip, only to once again find it empty.

Luke laughed, it was warm and engulfing and made the small space of Reid’s desk feel safe and homey. “You really know how to chug your coffee huh? It is a miracle you ever sleep.”

“Sometimes I don’t.”

He hadn’t meant to say it. Hadn’t meant to bring his problems into the workplace. It was all too weird. Any time he brought his private life to work it ended in misery. And anytime he brought his work into his private life for that matter. No, Luke didn’t need to hear about his sleep problems. They were FBI agents, of course they all had nightmares. Luke didn’t need to hear the excruciating details. In fact, Luke probably had them too. Luke _knew_ what Reid was experiencing.

But then, Luke’s eyes softened. Once filled with light, they were dimmed now, and Reid became aware of how dark the office was, how many books were around him, how enclosed and trapped he was.

“You don’t?”

He shook his head, fingernails gripping into his chair. Why did this feel like an interrogation?

“I spend most of my nights here. Reading, finishing cases…” His voice failed him. He knew sleep was important. He also knew that PTSD and nightmares kept him up. Did he even _have_ PTSD? Clearing his throat, Reid looked away from Luke. His watch ticked loudly in the silence that had fallen over them like a thin veil. One in the morning. “You should get going. _We_ should get going.”

There was a pause, where neither Luke nor Reid looked at each other. Neither spoke. Reid was faintly aware of footsteps on the floor and a shadow retreating away from his desk.

“What about coffee? Tomorrow morning, or I guess today.” There was a hint of humor in Agent Alvez’s voice. “The place next to the hospital. Let’s say eight.”

Startled by the offer, Reid spun towards him on his chair, unable to form words. Unable to comprehend why Luke wanted to get coffee with him before work. That’s when he noticed the book in his hand. It was the one he’d been holding during their conversation, when Reid had recommended him more books on the topic of mental illnesses. He had actually wanted to read it.

Reid was always recommending books and documentaries for the agents to watch and very rarely did they come back to him saying they had followed through on the recommendation. It was just another reminder that Luke was different.

"Yeah.” Quiet, barely more than a whisper. Then louder, “Eight is perfect. I’ll see you then Luke.”

Just like he had the previous night, Luke had grabbed his bag, and left through the doors, leaving Reid in the dark, alone with his thoughts, and seven hours to prepare for coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> coffee date time >:)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy a new work I'm doing! I'm thinking it will be a slow burn, lots of fluff, coffee dates, etc.


End file.
